One Night At AWOL

Saturday night my friend Jessica and I went down to a bar called AWOL. A guy there said I was cute. His name was Robert; he was 37, beer belly, not particularly hot, but not bad looking. He gave me his number; I called him the next day and met him there again. He asked if he bought us a pitcher of beer, would I take him home? I said I would do that when I was ready to go. After all, it says "nice guy" not "taxi cab" on my forehead. In the mean time, I had talked to two friends, Dana and Dustin. I told Dustin that Dana was on her way, so he came down (despite his ex being there) to see her and I.

When Robert and I ran out of beer, but before Dustin showed up, he was "ready to go." I said, "My friends are on their way, so I would like to wait for them a little bit. You can't be here if you have nothing to drink?" He promised that my friends weren't showing up. About that time, Dustin walked thru the door. Robert continued moping while I said hi to Dustin. Robert was getting more and more agitated about "having to walk home." I told him that he certainly did not have to walk home, but that if he didn't walk, he would have to wait. He called me a liar because I said I would take him home, but that I had not yet done that. I told him that I was still there, and that he only needed to worry about a ride home if he came out of the bathroom and I was not to be found anywhere in the bar. Which, incidentally, was getting very close to happening if he didn't back up.

He said, "Well, its gonna take me a couple hours to walk home, so I'll talk to ya later." He pecked me on the cheek and walked from the smoking shack into the bar. I told Dustin, "Ten to one, he's still inside." About that time he came back out to smoke again. A few more sneers, and some nasty comments. I said, "Go get in the car. Dana's coming and she will skin me if she got dressed to come down here and I'm not here, but I'll take you home now." As I was turning from Parsons Ave. to Broad St, I swore I saw Dana's car coming around the corner. I called Dustin and told him to find her and make sure she didn't leave until I got back.

I went up to Fifth and High Streets and back to the bar in about 10 minutes flat. Just as I pulled back up to the bar, Dustin called and said, "I still haven't seen Dana." I ran in and looked high and low: the smoking shack, both bathrooms, the basement. I went back out front to start combing parking lots and smoke, because I still swear I saw her car. At that moment, Dana called. She explained that she had gone to get dressed and woke up 45 minutes later face down on the bed with her shoes still on. I was and still am so excited that she never made it. I love Dana, but she scares me. I tremble to think of the trouble if she had shown up I was not there. I went back in and told Dustin she was safe, and everything worked out in the end.

Since I had taken Robert home, I could talk to other people. That was a whole different issue for another day. Anyway, thinking positively, I wrote my number on a piece of paper, and went to find my prey. Find him I did. I went up to this guy, Adam, and said "I've been admiring you from afar tonight." We talked about a show he was in the night before and made other small talk. Then, I said, "I don't talk to people all that often in the bar, and I know that you're supposed to talk to someone then offer your number. But, I think Dustin and I are getting ready to leave, so would you like my number? Will you call me?" He said, "Sure, I'll take your number." It was then that I realized my dilemma. So, I came clean. I said, "On the off chance that you said 'yes', I wrote my number down already. By pulling this out of my pocket and handing it to you, doesn't make me desperate. Does it?" He laughed, gave me a hug, said I was funny, and took my number. Even if he doesn't call me, we talked a little bit, and he was nice. Maybe my sights are set a little low, but when a cute guy takes my number and gives me a hug, I consider it a successful night.

Dustin and I went to my house and ate a pizza and watched a movie. I told him that I had done some thinking and I think I have figured myself out. Basically, I feel like my life is at a "cruising speed." It is almost too difficult to meet someone and get them up to my speed. I am certainly not quicker or sharper, nor do I think I'm above anyone. I have a certain group of friends that "get me." My humor, my mannerisms, etc etc. To meet someone new and be who they want me to be just to spring the real me on them later is just not worth it. That doesn't mean that I'm giving up, just that it's gonna take someone really special. I think I'm going to write a guidebook of myself. Kind of like the pamphlets you get at the free clinic.